Totally Unrelated Gratuitous Harem Pic

A blacklisting censorship bill is being considered by a committee of the United States House of Representatives this week.

Censoring the Internet is, of course, something totally unholy. Demonic. Immoral. Something that the Santorum-worshippers would do.

Naturally the people of the Internet are up in arms. The Electronic Frontier Foundation has issued a call to action, complete with a toolkit for activism.

A New Breed of Engineers?

An updated version of the Stop Online Piracy Act, as the bill is called, was released Monday afternoon. Read it! Most of it reads like an engineering specification document for modifications to the DNS system, essentially mandating that the system should FAIL when presented with an input that matches the contents of the government blacklist.

Thousands of hard-working engineers have endeavored, over many decades, to create the Internet that we all know and love. It’s a system that has proven amazingly useful, resilient, and adaptable. The Internet – and its essential constituent components such as DNS – have raised humanity to a whole new level.

And the engineers are still working! They’re implementing IPV6. They’re implementing DNSSEC. Constant improvement is the task of this global community of engineers. And it’s a task they are up to because they have the education and the experience and the creativity to do the job.

But the folks in Congress think they can do better engineering work than the guys who, you know, have actually been doing the work!

Wow, these Congresspeople are smart! More educated and more experienced and more creative than the people that engineered the Internet???!!! Wow… wow… wow…!!!

Ptthheew! Sorry, I just snarfed it. These people are idiots.

Threats Generally Work

I’m not talking about physical threats.

I simply suggest you call, e-mail, complain in person… Threaten your Congressman that if he or she supports S.O.P.A., you will vote for the other guy in 2012, and that you’ll encourage your family and friends and colleagues to vote for the other guy, and that you’ll donate to the other guy, and that you’ll complain on the Internet and in other public forums about how your Congressperson helped ruin the Internet and ought to be voted out of office for doing so.

The Internet is holy. It must be defended.

You know… it’s awfully hard to come to grips with the bat-shit-insane political situation in American right now.

Just last week, for instance, the U.S. Senate passed the Glenn Greenwald Assassination Act– no, not it’s official name, but nonetheless an accurate description of what it intends to accomplish.

Now all of America is a battlefield. Anyone whom the American Regime considers to be a “terrorist” can be summarily killed by the military. And only the Regime gets to decide who’s a terrorist and who isn’t. No courts are involved. There is no trial.

Just imagine if Nixon had this power! The power to kill whomever he wanted would have been the ultimate trump card against all sorts of political difficulties. Daniel Ellsberg’s leaking of the Pentagon Papers, for instance, would have certainly qualified as a terrorist act. And then Ellsberg could have been shot in the head. Woodward and Bernstein’s exposé of the Watergate scandal could have been labelled a terrorist act too. Shot in the head, and shot in the head.

With a bada-bing and a bada-bang, all of Nixon’s problems could have been solved! Then there would have been no scandal for Dick. No resignation for Dick. Long live King Nixon!

So now, going forward, when regular critic of the American Regime (and Salon blogger) Glenn Greenwald gets a little too mouthy, or comes across some significant evidence of malfeasance that might resonate a little too much with the generally disinterested public, he can be labelled a “terrorist” too. And then the Regime will shoot him in the head. Bye, bye, Gleeny-boy! Republicans will cheer! Democrats will cheer! God bless America!

Now, about the politics:

Have you been paying attention to the whole debt-ceiling thing?

It was like a season of a mediocre TV series. The tension was fake. The characters were empty and predictable. Everyone knew how the season would end.

But of course the season finale yesterday was still dramatic: The House of Representatives decided, at the last minute and at Obama’s urging, to not impose an immediate financial catastrophe on the world.

America gets to live to borrow borrow borrow another day… YAY!

Gabrielle Giffords, whom you might remember from last season as “the Congresswoman who was shot in the head in Tuscon”, came back to work for the first time to cast her vote. As her presence became known, there was a long round of thunderous applause, just like Chancellor Palpatine got after he was disfigured by Samuel L. Jackson in Star Wars III.

There is an ominous development: a Super Congress has been created to make sure that the small players in the legislative business– mostly the Tea Party “terrorists”– don’t get in the way of the big fish anymore. We can’t have those annoying dweebs obstructing the will of the mighty Establishment, can we?

So I reluctantly admit that the finale was somewhat interesting. But the season overall was nonetheless mediocre; and the series as a whole is booooooring.

Maybe they could work the cast of Seinfeld into the storyline for next season? That would be an improvement, don’t you think?

It happened when I was in sixth grade Social Studies class. I was about 12 years old. All students were assigned the task of designing a country. We were supposed to determine the style of government, and describe in writing the customs and laws of our society.

This was back in the mid-Reagan era, when the Cold War was in full they’re-gonna-nuke-us-anyday-now mode. The project was probably intended to make each student choose an American-style system for himself. Any kid who designed a communist country like the big bad U.S.S.R. would have to answer some tough questions when he presented his design to the class… such as: Do you really think that badass Russian Dolph Lundgren should have won over Rocky Balboa? Cue the shame!

But I got interested in the project in a way that was subtly sexual. What distinguished my design was that, in my ideal country, beachwear would be see-through! Something like this:

I remember one girl who I had a crush on asked me: What’s the point of having see-through bathing suits?

The true answer, of course, was that it resonated with my nascent hedonism and horniness in a way that I couldn’t elucidate. But instead I told her: That’s just the way it is in my country. We must, I explained to my fellow Sixth Graders, respect the customs of people in other societies, even if we find them a little strange. We must not engage in ethnocentrism!

Then I went on to describe how every single aspect of my society was based, in one way or another, on the see-through bathing suit concept. The government would be honest and transparent; they could not tell a lie. There would be total freedom except for the fact that hot women would be forbidden to don any swimwear that was not see-through. My teacher tried to steer my presentation in another direction– any other direction!– but I persisted with the idea that this was just how my country was. I had a presentation to give and was not going to accept being censored! Free speech! Free speech!

Photos from Bikini-Pleasure

A few hours ago, New York State approved gay marriage.

And I’m shocked. I’ve ranted and raved and been furiously angry with The System for so long that, when something genuinely good gets done, I don’t know what to think.

I want to find the contrary angle. I have an instinct to hunt out the hypocrisy and corruption that permeates government… What’s up y’er sleeve? Who’s got their fingers crossed?

But there ain’t any bad stuff here. This is true progress for liberty and individualism. Good fucking job, New York!

UPDATE: Oh wait… Here’s a contrary angle from Reason’s Hit & Run Blog:

A libertarian friend writes, “When did states setting the terms of exchange become an expression of right to contract? The only rights-based approach would be states to stop setting the rules of marriage at all. Sadly we just get a stronger but fairer state.”

Eh… doesn’t seem like an argument that would cause it to rain on the gay pride parade, does it? I guess it’s good that someone tried, tho’…

Here’s a quote for ‘ya… Try reading it out loud in an impassioned voice:

To be GOVERNED is to be watched, inspected, spied upon, directed, law-driven, numbered, regulated, enrolled, indoctrinated, preached at, controlled, checked, estimated, valued, censured, commanded, by creatures who have neither the right nor the wisdom nor the virtue to do so. To be GOVERNED is to be at every operation, at every transaction noted, registered, counted, taxed, stamped, measured, numbered, assessed, licensed, authorized, admonished, prevented, forbidden, reformed, corrected, punished. It is, under pretext of public utility, and in the name of the general interest, to be placed under contribution, drilled, fleeced, exploited, monopolized, extorted from, squeezed, hoaxed, robbed; then, at the slightest resistance, the first word of complaint, to be repressed, fined, vilified, harassed, hunted down, abused, clubbed, disarmed, bound, choked, imprisoned, judged, condemned, shot, deported, sacrificed, sold, betrayed; and to crown all, mocked, ridiculed, derided, outraged, dishonored. That is government; that is it’s justice; that is it’s morality.

That’s from the 1851 book General Idea of the Revolution in the Nineteenth Century by French dude Pierre-Joseph Proudhon. Even now, after more than a century-and-a-half, it remains an inspiring rant, especially when appreciated from a modern libertarian perspective.

I got this from this Open Yale course on European History by John Merriman. Here’s a short clip with the Professor telling heart-warming story about a regular workaday anarchist from the same time period:

direct link to video (mobile-friendly)

So this morning I tried something new: I went to see a psychotherapist.

Yes, my dear readers, I sought “treatment”– just like dirtbag Congressman Anthony Weiner has.

But there’s a difference. Anthony Weiner entered treatment because he has a seemingly irresistible desire to tweet his cock and fantasize that he lives the life of a lesser Charlie Sheen minus the tigerblood.

Not me. I’m happy with where I am in my sex-picture-posting life. Very happy. My problem is a little different: I can’t stop thinking about politics. I can’t stop hating the corruption and the fakery and the manipulation and the lying. I hate that America is turning into a police state. I read The Agitator and it makes me… ummm… agitated!

I’ve entered therapy in the hope that it will help me stop worrying about Anthony Weiner and his ilk. I want to focus on relatively moral and honest things like porn and pot, and not concern myself with obscene, morally-repugnant things like what happens in Washington.

A Benzo Morning Appointment

Only problem was that my therapist appointment was bright and early in the morning, at a time when the early surfers are surfing and the roosters of Oceanside are cock-a-doodle-do’ing.

I am not a morning person.

Before I posted the Hegre-Art girls last night, a little before midnight, I took three benzos so I would be able to get to sleep.

Then, when 7am rolled around, I got up and had some coffee… from my now-functional fucking coffeemaker, thank you very much! But I felt anxious that I had taken so many benzos eight hours earlier. So I took two more benzos to alleviate the anxiety.

After the therapy session, I realized something: Therapy is just like the Catholic sacrament of confession. The only difference is that with therapy you don’t have to feel bad about it.

Well… that and instead of paying in prayers, you pay in cash.

Maybe Others Will Seek Political Therapy Too?

So this morning I’m reading Zero Hedge and Glenn Greenwald– the normal fare chronicling the decline and fall of the American Empire– while waiting for the coffee to brew.

Waiting. And waiting. And waiting…

WTF?! The fucking coffeemaker just stopped working! This is not supposed to happen.

As I unpacked and set up the new replacement coffeemaker, I realized that this portends the future of America. One day we’ll wake up and expect America and the American government and the American Dollar to all work, but they’ll refuse and demand to be replaced instead.

That replacement cannot be done with a quick run to Wal-Mart tho’.

Which Brings Me To Weiner…

Actually, no. I’m not going to go there.

I was going to write about the dick-tweeting and man-slutting Congressman Weiner, but he ain’t worth mentioning on this esteemed porn blog. My dysfunctional $25 coffeemaker is more important than he is. I just don’t fucking care about him.

I will point out that he is in “treatment” now. Maybe he failed the seven-orgasms-per-week test? Did you know that there is a seven-orgasms-per-week test? Oh how the mind boggles!

Dr. Marty Klein says that Weiner is no worse than the other miscreants in public office. I guess he’s correct about that. But I still hate them all. I hate the constant lying and constant groveling and constant busybody-ing and constant posturing.

C’mon, guys, let’s see The Face:

That right there– that’s the face of your government for ‘ya. The face of fucking fuckwads. The face of the Weiner Republic.

I tried to start a political blog. Not here, of course. It was somewhere else.

Actually, the new political blog never got going at all. So, to be precise, I should say that I tried to start writing about politics for a general non-pornographic audience.

But I couldn’t. The words didn’t flow; the thoughts didn’t cohere; the substance was uninspiring. It came out as a pile of “blah blah whatever”.

I can write about politics just fine… but only after I’ve slapped a naked chic up there at the top of the post.

She doesn’t even need to be an attractive naked chic. This one, for instance, is fugly as all hell, but she is gagged and tied to a crucifix in the nature, and that makes up the difference.

What was I writing about? Oh yeah… politics!

I don’t care about the political topics that are on the fucking “agenda”. I didn’t agree to the agenda, motherfucker!!! Did Sarah Palin say something totally incomprehensible about Paul Revere ringing some fucking bells? Did some Democratic Congressman from New York tweet a picture of his erect cock, leading to the uncovering of a rather pathetic streak of virtual liaisons? Is Satan himself running for President?

Really… who gives a fuck about these meaningless things?

I don’t. I do not. I DON’T FUCKING CARE!!!

I do care about some things that I think are important… like the Drake case and its implications… and whatever else I hear Dan Carlin talk about on his Common Sense podcast… and the economics-related stuff I read at Zero Hedge… and the stuff that Glenn Greenwald, Matt Taibbi, and Radley Balko write about… and the continued legality of porn (WTF is this shit, btw???)… and the fact that the War on Drug Users needs to be shut down yesterday.

So, yes, there is political stuff worth writing about– stuff that goes beyond the trivial titillation that dominates the mainstream news cycle. But from now on I’m only gonna write about it after tossing out the fresh meat. Titties first, issues later.

And Sarah Palin can go suck Anthony Weiner’s twittered cock while Rick Santorum fucks her in the ass. Those people are the inconsequential. They are the distracting sideshow of political freakery. Not one of them is worthy of being written about, not even in a post with Fugly Crucifix Chic at the top.

Such films have long been a staple of law enforcement propaganda. Gotta ban all pornography because of them! Gotta fight porn’s terrible spread because, you know, it’s one small tiny step from browsing MET-ART to becoming a producer of the latest and greatest snuff flick.

A snuff film even featured as the main plot point in the 1979 Hollywood film Hardcore. In that, Geroge C. Scott plays a Midwestern businessman who heads to San Fransisco to rescue his daughter from the clutches of a demonic snuff porn business. Here’s the trailer:

Apparently, the more recent film 8MM is “inspired by” (i.e. it’s a rip-off of) Hardcore, also having a plot that centers around a snuff film.

But as the esteemed sex doctor Marty Klein points out, snuff films probably don’t exist. He hasn’t seen one. And he doesn’t know anyone who has seen one. And he doesn’t know anyone who knows anyone who has seen one. And he’s a fucking well-connected guy!!!

So snuff films are likely just the product of legend and of fear and of Hollywood screenwriting and of dishonest politically-motivated fabrication.

Maybe the reason for this is that we human beings don’t actually like the idea of killing other people. Maybe we find it universally awful at the most basic visceral level. And maybe this disgust with killing is something that is shared by all humans, even by those godless gay-loving pot-smoking heathens from California. Maybe those people with “San Fransisco values” have some morals after all, and maybe they’re not subhuman like we good god-fearing Haliburton stockholders have been saying all these years.

Maybe the only way to get a person to enjoy killing is through political warmongering and the associated collectivist brainwashing. Maybe snuff films don’t exist, but an atmosphere encouraging sadistic violence in the name of the political leadership of the day does.

Just so we are all clear what we are taking about.

If you want to hear the best commentary there is on politics in America, you should check out the Common Sense podcast by Dan Carlin. It’s marvelously thought-provoking stuff.

Prior to this day eight years ago, we had troubles concerning morality in this country. We thought that corruption and lies and political doublespeak were generally bad things. But thankfully all those unnecessary trivialities got swept away when we pulled ourselves together and decided we needed to “protect the country”. No we have no more moral qualms. No ethical issues really bother us anymore. What a relief!

For instance: Eight years ago, a politician like Mike Duvall might have had to actually apologize for his “family values” hypocrisy after it was found that he was cheating on his wife, and then cheating in turn on his mistress with another mistress who was a lobbyist with business before his committee, and then bragging about how his mistress liked to be spanked to a fellow California Assemblyman during a legislative session. But no more! Now, while the country is consumed with protecting itself, Mike “Family Values” Duvall can just let us know that this is a personal issue and that we ought to respect the privacy of everybody involved.

After all, you open your mouth too much, protest too much, and you just might be a terrorist too! Even though you are American citizen, you can still be held without charges in a small cell that’s brightly lit 24/7 for 16 days, and then released only under dehumanizing conditions, and then touted as a “terrorist” by the highest levels of the political establishment– all without the government having the excessive burden of ever going to court to present its case against you! And best of all, the Messiah Obama is totally okay with all of this! What a great fucking country!

Eight years ago, the only porn I liked was soft porn. I thought Penthouse was edgy, and I thought B.D.S.M. was the name of the investment bank where my dead co-blogger Sherman worked. But then the First Great Leader of our country told us that it was our patriotic duty to support torture. The Christian leadership also told us good Christians that it was our religious duty to support torture. The media like the beloved National Review told us that it was absolutely immoral to not support torture! So I read George Orwell’s 1984 and watched the movie Brazil and got totally turned on. And I just went from there…

Now I eagerly anticipate every new Elite Pain video and fantasize about the opportunity to do those sorts of things to those Allah-worshiping oil-hogging bitches! Give me a whip and a cattle prod and some pork sandwiches and send me to the women’s section at Gitmo! He-haw!

And yes, all those people died in New York and Washington and in Pennsylvania. But it was a small price to pay for securing the right for Mike Duvell to fuck lobbyists and be a gay-basher at the same time! And it is a small price to pay for showing every single American the delight of torture! Ah, beautiful beautiful torture! How I love thee!

Viva Dick Cheney! Viva Geroge Bush! Viva the New Messiah!

And happy 9/11 to you, dear reader! Happy 9/11!

It’s Back to School Day for many of the y’ngins here in America. What’s that mean for you, dear porn surfer? Well, it means you can send the kiddies off and start clicking away!

While the kiddies are at school today, the father of our country– the Messiah Obama– is going to give them a speech. In fact, he’s going to recognize that the televised speech is a one-way monologue so he’s gonna be brief. He’ll succinctly share the existential wisdom he acquired throughout his life, imploring children to enjoy their youth and live in the present just like Kung Fu Panda does. He’ll reassure them that they can dedicate themselves to their studies and the mindful exploration of life, content that the country is being run by competent and professional grown-ups.

What’s this? Wait a sec… Oh dear… It seems that I am completely wrong. He’s actually gonna give a so-called “discussion” that’s nearly ten times as long as the Gettysburg Address, insisting that children take over “responsibility” for America’s problems. Take responsibility, little children! You need to forsake your childhood and get to work!

Obama was the new Jesus. Now he’s telling the children of America that they have to be new Jesuses too– all you kids gotta take “responsibility” and save the fucking world! You are not an individual, you are part of the Collective and much is expected of you. In fact, the American establishment demands it; I, the Holy Obama, demand it! From each according to their ability, and we’ll sort out the “to each” part later…

Obama is doing his small part to put America’s kids on the express road to psychotherapy.

And in a way, he’s right: Young people do need to take responsibility if they want the country to change, but only because the adults have fucked it all up in their effort to maintain the two-party politico-media duopoly. Young people need to get it together and put an end to the Democrats and put an end to the Republicans. End them! End them now!

Oh well. At least you and I have porn. That’ll keep us sane. Pot helps too. And when the kids grow up and reach the age of legal adulthood, we can share our porn with them and smoke joints with them and help them realize that bullshit is bullshit and that watching porn and smoking pot are better ways of spending time than being a captive audience for orthodox establishment doublespeak.

I’m thinking that when I get to Denmark in two weeks, I’ll buy a black hat in Christiania and start wearing it with a black jacket and use the name “Schrödinger”.

Good ole’ Erwin, you know, was a bit of horny bastard, always insisting that he be able to have sex with both of the women he lived with… in addition to a bunch of casual fuck-buddy-girls on the side. He pursued this effective polygamy and open sexuality even though it cost him much of his illustrious career.

So all in all S- seems like a good namesake. Plus, H- is spoken for… anyway the original H- was a fucking Nazi bastard and that’s not cool at all.

That who name thing is a heavy thought… I’ve been thinking heavy thoughts this whole time… all the while licking chicken juice off my fingertips. You remember what Nietzsche said about this particular meal, don’t you?

If you stare for long into the fried chicken and french fries, the fried chicken and french fries stare back at you.
- Friedrich Nietzsche

OK… enough physics and philosophy. Let’s move on to professional wrestling. That, of course, means Jesse Ventura. The former governor of Minnesota is out on a media tour promoting his new book. He was on the Larry King show last week, where he was impressively direct, delivering a powerful argument and refusing to be diverted by his host’s attempts to rein in his anger.

Today he was on The View:

That Elisabeth Hasselbeck- the blonde one on the far right- is a real torture bitch, isn’t she? I love the way she struggles in vain to come up with any justification that supports the torture she so clearly loves to have inflicted in her name. Torture bitch gets her kicks from da torture.

But Jesse “The Body” Ventura ain’t having none of that. He just states his case for the law and he states what’s morally right and he does it all clearly and directly and without compromise. Meanwhile the religious people in this country play word games and promote their complexly immoral position… they’ve sold out their Jesus Christ and replaced him with Judge Holden.

Well, fuck ‘em. Fuck Cheney. Fuck the whole lot of lawyers who endorsed this demonic behavior and fuck the whole lot of servicemen who put it in effect. They deserve to be called to account before the law. Get the fucking truth out. I don’t think there’s a more important issue than this in America right now.

I’m with you on this, Mr. Body. The whole torture thing makes me so angry that from now on when I wake up each morning I’m going to hop out of bed and raise my arms in the air and scream “FUCK YOU AMERICA!”

Mmmm… that was some good chicken. Now I need some more Diet Coke. And then I’ll post the porn. Come back later and give me five minutes of your time…

Via The Cherry Red Report.

Meanwhile, in the real political world, supreme court justice David Souter is retiring. He’s going back to New Hampshire where he’ll enjoy the quiet serenity of nature and all that.

I also hear that he’s gonna produce some porn. ‘Cuz, you know, it’s totally legal in New Hampshire to shoot it. In CA and NH it’s 100% legal, and in Las Vegas it’s openly sanctioned by the local government. You are taking your chances anywhere else in the USA.

I wonder who Obama will pick to replace him. News reports say that it’s probably going to be woman. Rah Rah Identity Politics! Nobody knows if that’s true or not; it’s just the line the mainstream media is pushing– they keep on suggesting that he will pick a woman because they want him to pick a woman.

Can’t he just pick a libertarian? Posner? Volokh? Kozinski? There are so many super-qualified, if male, libertarian-leaning candidates.

Perhaps he would pick a libertarian if we had a stronger organized Libertarian influence in America politics.

I think some of the libertarian-leaning Republicans should start calling themselves “Libertarian Republicans”.

And some of the libertarian-leaning Democrats should start calling themselves “Libertarian Democrats”.

Then you have an effective third party in American politics that would overlap with the existing two-party system. You can’t change the two-party system; it’s too entrenched. But if you could cobble a third-party together in a sneaky overlapping way, it would be good for America and really good for us libertarians.

I mean, really, there is no political opposition now, is there? What do Republicans stand for anyway? Theocratic authority? Torture? Massive state prosecution for marijuana? Corruption? Lies? Incompetence? I’ll take Obama any day over that. Republicans offer absolutely nothing. Zero. Nada. Squat.

So you keep spankin’ those Republicans, you big O you… Toss an extra stroke or two in there on my behalf; you can tell Palin as you’re hitting her that the extra smacks are for her selling out the libertarian side of her party.

This past week Vermont legalized same-sex marriage. Vermont is the first state to do so through the legislature instead of through the courts.

This comes on top of the legalization of gay marriage in Iowa a few days earlier. In Iowa it was achieved by a unanimous ruling of the state supreme court.

Las Cucarachas No Like The Gays

And so what has happened since?

Well, the religious people have come out of the woodwork like fucking cockroaches. They’ve all got their panties in a bunch because of something that affects them in no way whatsoever!

The Pink Mafia

First, there’s this article by some crackpot named Michael Savage.

He says that last year’s political effort to legalize gay marriage in California was driven by the “gay mafia”. Mafia? Where? All I see are guys going to Wet Underwear Night at Flicks, and fat bald chicks walking around holding hands with other fat bald chicks. Not a Soprano-style guido-guy in sight.

Then again, calling a group a people a “mafia” without reason is bigotry. And maybe expressing that bigotry is the whole point.

Savage goes on to say that these legal developments “come as a result of the election of Barack Hussein Obama”. He was sure to put the “Hussein” in there so you can associate Obama with a middle-eastern terrorist– apparently these religious people never miss the opportunity to take a cheap and bigoted shot.

And then this about Obama: “He’s being very cleverly used as a tool of the gay puppet masters. He is personally masculine, has a beautiful family and was used by the gay mafia to convince real American families that they should support him.”

You know what? Calling people “puppet masters” is just as bigoted as calling them a “mafia”. And insinuating that Obama’s masculinity and beautiful family were taken advantage of by these said puppet masters is doubling down on the bigotry.

“The Link Between Gay Marriage and Mass Murders”

It seems that the religious people are not content with simple “mafia” and “puppet master” bigotry.

Morality in Media’s Robert Peters wrote this article “connecting the dots… between gay marriage and mass murders”.

You know what even associating gay marriage and mass murder is? Yes, you guessed it. More bigotry.

Oh, wait… at the end of his piece he claims that he’s not making the claim that he, ummm, just made:

“It most certainly is not my intention to blame the epidemic of mass murders on the gay rights movement! It is my intention to point out that the success of the sexual revolution is inversely proportional to the decline in morality; and it is the decline of morality (and the faith that so often under girds it) that is the underlying cause of our modern day epidemic of mass murders.”

Mr. Peters: You really are stretching it, aren’t you? You just put gay marriage and mass murder together and then you add these weasel words because you can’t stand fully behind your original proposition! It seems that even you yourself realize that you are a bigot!

This Next One Is Right Out of the Nazi Playbook

OMG! Look! The religious people did a reinterpretation of Triumph of the Will:

The dark clouds… the lightning… “the storm is coming”… This is so full of bigotry through every line and every image and even the whole set up.

These Religious People Are Immoral

These people don’t have a monopoly on morality just because they consider themselves “religious”.

Their bigotry and unwillingness to let others live in peace is WRONG. In fact, it’s reflective of moral failure.

That’s right– these assholes are being called out for their immoral bigotry by a fucking porn blog!

Let’s Take The Opportunity

My fellow wankers, let’s see this an opportunity… it’s an opportunity to claim “morality” back from those who abuse the term.

These religious bigots think they get to define what’s moral and what’s not.

But we are more evolved. You and me, we are existentialist, postmodern, thoughtful people… We know more than they do. We have experienced more than they will. We have invested in living this life rather than some fantasy after-world that will never come to me.

“Morality” is more open to definition by us rather than them.

I think we need to remember that.

John Thompson is also the well-known producer of the rough cum-orgy site German Goo Girls, the piss-orgy site 666 Bukkake, and the category-defying GGG Sex Box.

Seems to me that Obama has found just the right person for the job!

Alas… it’s not the same John Thompson. But I bet some politico nuts had a bit of a surprise on their computer screens when they googled the name.

It’s certainly been an exciting week, hasn’t it? With the new handsome, young, and suntanned face of America taking office; and with the gun-loving and gay-loving Kirsten Gillibrand taking over Hillary Clinton’s Senate seat…

You know, reading the news has become as titillating as watching good girl-girl porn– there’s been two objects of adoration on the screen.

And Kirsten lives in Hudson, NY!!! That’s where I grew up… I’m sooo happy for her and for all the denizens of Upstate. The upstaters would have hated Caroline Kennedy. Caroline may be American royalty, but every other advanced Western country has realized that you don’t allow your top royalty to run for office… and so how could Caroline have expected to continue to be treated with royal deference once she tossed her hat into the ring? In the modern world, you can be either a political princess or a political prostitute, not both.

The only people who dislike Kirsten-Babe are Democrats who can’t look beyond five minutes into the future. I mean… you Democrats have the Presidency now, plus big margins of control in both houses of Congress… do you really need to make sure that every new member of the political major league is as far left as the moment will allow? How about thinking of one year, two years, five years from now, and realizing that it’s going to be the centrists who pull you through when things get rough? Or have you learned absolutely nothing from the Bush years?

Anyway… all of this has been very exciting. But for me there’s also been a dark side. I’ve become addicted to the news. I’m now a current events junkie. And it’s probably harder to kick the psychological news-addiction than it is to kick a physical addiction to Obama-brand heroin.

My name is Sherman and I’m an Obamaholic.

I will try to quit now. Cold turkey, more or less. Stop wasting my time on trivialities like the fate of the world and return to things that are really important… like PORN!

Most of all, I want to stop reading the New York Times. It is just plain stupid. Very little in it has anything to do with my life. It’s all just a sort of mental voyeurism disguised as “news”. And Maureen Dowd did this horrible, horrible piece on Kirsten-Babe and the Princess that really turned me off. (Although that big article on the sex desires of women was worthwhile… very badly written, and filled with superficiality and timidity, but the report of the state of sex research was worth all the pain.)

I will allow myself only one small portal outside the pornographic world. And it will be… ALTHOUSE! My favorite blogger. I will rely on her to sift through the muck of modern life for me, trusting that she will blog what is important. She seems to know how to tap into my mindset. Probably helps in that regard that she blogs about sex about a third of the time anyway.

I will not read the New York Times unless the lovely Ann Althouse sends me there. I will not read Andrew Sullivan unless the lovely Ann Althouse sends me there. Same with Reason and Instafuckit and everyone else too…

This is the true advantage of the Internet age– the ability to essentially outsource your thinking! I can know all I need to know about the world without the pain and effort. And best thing is that Ann does it all for free!

Now that we have a half-black president, you white fogies might want to get a bit more acquainted with black culture. And there is really only one type of black person that epitomizes black culture: the PIMP!

Here… this dude will show you what it’s all about. Lee is the big black boss of the Pimp Parade section of the esteemed PornPros Network. It’s a long clip– fourteen and a half minutes– so you might want to grab some fried chicken or something like that to snack on before you hit the play button…

More PornPros: 18 Years Old, Shady P.I., Sleep Creep, Cock Competition, Real Ex-Girlfriends, Deep Throat Love, Freaks of Cock.

And now let’s meet fucking contestant number fucking two in the fucking bluster-battle to manage this clusterfuck… She’s a fucking beauty pageant queen with a fucking bee-hive hairdo and fucking librarian fucking glasses and she fucking shoots fucking moose, fears fucking God, and is fucking itchin’ to fucking Bomb-Bomb-Bomb Bomb-Bomb fucking Iran. Are you fucking serious?

But, my fucking friends, Ed Norton already got fucking there, five fucking years ago. And that fucking 25th Hour is what all you Wall Street fucking wankers should be watching right fucking now, because you gotta fucking come to terms with the fucking dawn! Bzzzzzz! That’s the fucking alarm clock, motherfuckers! It’s morning in America. And today we fucking report to fucking jail.

And that’s just the fucking warmup to what’s happened in the last five years. We are all Montgomery Brogan now. America had it all and threw it away…

From How Good is That?